Fortunately, even though I have not blogged, I have kept a running list of highlights so that when I DO sit down to blog again I will not forget. I am astonished at all the things we have experienced/done since my last post. Life has come at us very quickly, and there is much to reflect on, which I will do as I go along.
Today there is bad news and good. The good is that the weather is GORGEOUS outside. The bad is that I am stuck inside with one of the worst neck aches of my life, due to my recent heroic efforts as a donkey in the airport on our trip back home (to Ireland) and as a Minecraft Enderman with a cardboard box on my head for Halloween, which exacerbated the problem....dramatically. The other good news is that now I have an excuse to blog while I keep my head perfectly still because even whisking my hair to one side will bring about excruciating pain.
And so YOU now benefit from my sufferings. I will offer them up with the Communion of Saints in Heaven on this All Saints Day 2015!
If you are anal retentive and good at math, you might glance back at my last chronological post and see that it occurred back at Mother's Day, which was in May, which was 5 1/2 months ago! So now you know how much catching up there is to do. From now on I think I will make each post about a MONTH, rather than a week, or I may go to my grave with this left undone.
So here is the rest of May.
Some of you may know, or have picked up on, that we have some long time friends here, the McCabes. Thomas met Niall back in 1992 when he spent the summer in Ireland. Niall later visited the U.S., and we have visited with them each time we have come to Ireland. Niall and Mel have expanded into Niall and Mel with two adorable Irish kids, Alex and Evie (almost 8 and 4). We had the pleasure of having them as our first official guests to host at our home. It was a great day. After Mass that morning we meandered down to Roberts, our local fish market, which carries all sorts of delicious gourmet foods, and filled our basket with cheeses and chutneys to create a spread to enjoy. The kids played while we had stimulating, interesting, and sometimes humorous conversation. It is true what they say about the Irish and the gift of gab. There is rarely empty space in the conversation. Mel has been helpful to me in figuring out the functional aspects of life in Ireland, so we went around the house getting advice on things. I think she finds it gas to hear how things that she takes for granted every day is so new to us! What would I do without her? And Niall is particularly thoughtful in his discussion, which meets my need for periodic deep conversation. He also relishes in learning about our experience in this land they both love so much. We really enjoy their company and their welcoming attitude. They have been really good about prioritizing getting together, instead of letting life just pass by, always saying, "We should get together SOME time!" They have been a true gift to us.
Thomas had learnt about GAA (Gaelic Athletic Association) from people at work, and he thought it would be good for Sam to join in. Our understanding is that Sam would be playing Gaelic Football, which he knew nuttin' about. He was refusing to go to his first practice, worrying that all the other 8 and 9 year old boys would have been playing all their life. But Niall and Alex took Sam and Thomas out to the park across the way to give Sam a crash course in the rules of this mysterious sport. By the end of it, Sam felt confident enough to go to his first training the next day.
After our time at the park, we came back and...ahem....enjoyed....some lively, spirited debate about the upcoming referendum over wine (Mel only...Niall was designated driver) and pizza. There was a buzz in the air about the upcoming vote to change the constitution to allow homosexual marriage. That morning we witnessed our parish priest being interviewed by the news about the Church's stance on the issue. In the weeks prior, I had found myself passionately pouring over newspapers and the internet to get a feel for what was going on. I had only learned about the referendum a few weeks before and assumed it would never pass in conservative Ireland, but my learning curve was large and fast to catch up with what was really the mindset of the culture nowadays. The "Yes"campaign had huge momentum. There were signs everywhere encouraging people to vote, mostly for YES. I had noticed the media's angle, and also discovered the lack of funding for the NO campaign.
The YES campaign had millions of dollars poured into it by U.S. organizations, and it paid off. That week, May 22, 69% of the people of Ireland voted in favor of legalizing gay marriage. It truly was unprecedented here, with previous referendums on other social issues falling flat. I always try to see both sides of issues, and our conversation with Niall and Mel brought them up for sure. Sometimes I am unclear as to the purpose of my blog. Is it to convey information to my family and friends about what we are doing? Or do I want it to read more like an auto-biography, to express deeper, more intimate reflection on how this experience has affected me and our family? I could elaborate on my thoughts and feeling about the referendum, but for now, in this moment, I will leave my personal thoughts on this particular issue aside and move on. But first, what I will say is that what we are coming to know as "Ireland" is a changing culture, but not without it's paradoxical pull between preserving the traditions and culture of the past and moving into the new, more global mindset of change and openness to new thoughts, cultures, and ideas. In general, I see Ireland as a country that was so long repressed and looked down upon, that there is a lingering sense by the people that they must not lie down and be led by others, being seen as a country in isolation and left behind in progress, but that they will take the lead and make a name for themselves in this One World. The young people of Ireland are proud of their expression and influence, and see changes in traditionally "moral issues," decided by the Church (birth control, divorce, gay marriage), as progress. Also, the Irish people are compassionate, caring people, especially toward the "underdog." They can't stand to see injustices or for someone to be oppressed. I believe this comes from their deep history of oppression, as well as their long beautiful Catholic tradition of helping and serving the poor and needy. In that light, this referendum, understandably, was viewed as a victory for equality and fairness. And that highlights the goodness of the Irish heart, no matter how one feels about this particular issue or the definition of love, marriage, or family, which is a deep, controversial one.
I appreciate that Niall and Mel are respectful of contrasting ideas and thoughts, and I always value friendships that involve challenging one another to see different viewpoints.
Later that week after the referendum passed, someone from Amnesty International stopped my outside the market to ask for financial help. He was from the UK, and his focus was on the good that AI does around the world to promote human rights for women, particularly in Africa. It eventually led to a dialogue about abortion, and when he found out I was pro-life, he very abruptly turned from me, telling he could not speak to me anymore because it was a waste of both of our time and he was there for a very "specific purpose." I was visibly shaken and went into the store in tears, thinking that he had the idea that I did not care about human rights, when I deeply do! The very next day I saw on the news a conference hosted by Amnesty International that was about advocating for abortion rights in Ireland. THIS was the REAL reason the man was raising funds...not for the end of FGM (look it up if you are interested) in Africa, but to campaign for abortion legalization in Ireland. Right now Ireland has the most pro-life, anti-abortion Constitution in the world, but thanks to Amnesty International and other's push to legalize it here, I believe the public mindset is shifting, and abortion will likely be the next thing to be legalized here.
I have noticed a much larger population of Downs Syndrome people here out in the community...just out and about, living life like anyone else. There seems to be a great respect and kindness toward the disabled and the weak. It truly is a lovely thing to see them so well groomed and a part of society. I wondered if perhaps the genes of the Irish people tend to carry more Downs, or maybe it is because Irish women have a history of bearing children late in life. But a visitor from Texas pointed out to me that it could also be because of the lack of legalized abortion in Ireland. That stunned me to realize the implications of what that means for Downs children in the U.S. and other countries where abortion is legal.
I only mention all of this because it is important, I think to understanding the overall picture of the culture in Ireland today. Some may see it as advancement to make Irish society more just, open and compassionate. Some may see it as caving to the pressure of the rest of the world, rather than holding fast to the traditional "Catholic" values of the country. If this is true, then, as Bishop Diarmuid Martin said, the Church in Ireland "needs a reality check." Why has the mindset shifted to radically? Indeed, Ireland is in a state of identity crisis, and I believe that the Ireland of the past is behind us.
Monday Sam attended his first GAA training. How COOL! What an experience!! It just happened to be one of thee wettest, coldest days we had had yet, and there Sam was running around in the rain in shorts with a bunch of pasty white kids used to running around in the rain, while I stood there under a man's umbrella, shivering, while we had 30 second of rain, 2 minutes of dry, 30 sec of rain, 2 minutes of none, and so on. (The weather was unexpected and caught me off guard!) The coaches were very welcoming to Sam. (One child was mean and unwelcoming, telling Sam he hoped he failed....Can you believe that?! But Sam just let it roll off of him. We were proud of him.) After kicking around the Gaelic football, they handed Sam a stick and a baseball looking ball, and led him to go for it in the hurling match. Wait....HURLING? What's THAT?? Niall had not prepared us for hurling! Suddenly Sam was thrust in a crowd of little boys all hitting around a ball on the ground with a huge stick! Fortunately they had a helmet for Sam to borrow. What an Irish experience. He loved it and could not wait to go back He thanked Thomas for making him go.
Later that week we had a return of the lovely weather, and the kids and I hiked up for our first picnic on Killiney Hill. It was the first day I thought maybe I should have worn shorts....for about 1 hour! Surrounded by yellow gorse bushes, we painted and relished in the sunshine, the brilliant blue sky, and the view of the Irish Sea.
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| yellow gorse bushes |
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| using my shirt as "shorts" |
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| View from Killiney Hill |
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| My attempt to paint it. Still need to add the gorse. |
The last weekend of May ended with a trip to City Centre, where we had ourselves a grand time at Merriam Square, relishing in the bursting new springtime flower beds. We sat on a bench and rolled with laughter as we played "Kissing Telephone," kissing each other on the cheek each time we whispered a message in the ear of the person who would then pass our message on to the next person until we came up with goofy phrases at the end of the line. After dinner at our new favorite family-friendly Asian place, Mao (to fill in for Mama Fu or Pei Wei in Austin while we are away),we finished the day at O'Donoghue's pub. Kids are allowed in pubs until 9 pm.
On Sunday we met up with another old buddy of Thomas, Lenny (His real name is Colm), short for Lenny O' Leprechaun! We met him in Dun Laoghaire and walked out on the long famous Dun Laoghaire pier. It was a cool but sunny day, and dreamy to view the boats on the docks and in the sea.
We explored the lighthouse at the end of the pier, and it was there that Lenny introduced us to "Teddy's," home of the "99." This is a scoop of soft serve ice-cream with a Cadbury's flake in it. Cadbury's chocolates are like wings in Texas....a zillion different flavors and forms of chocolate to choose from, and a staple of the Irish diet. The reason for the name "99" is that the "flake" was the 99th version of chocolate that Cadbury created.
Driving in Ireland has been interesting, and at this point I was full swing into life and it had become a necessity of my week. As if driving on the opposite side of the road is not enough to think about, when one drives in our town, and those like it, it is a game of chicken. The road is "two way" but with the cars parked on the sides, there really is only one, narrow lane to drive in. So when one comes to a situation where another car is facing them, then one must decide if it is their turn or the other persons. Who will get out of the way and let the other pass? And there are no rules about this. Does one stand their ground and be assertive, thinking they were there first? Or does one be cautious and courteous, letting the other person go first, who is the then in a game of "Who is more cautious and courteous? Because I want YOU to go first." "no, you." "No. You!"
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| Very narrow "two way roads" |
The lights are in all different places, and sometimes you are staring at three different lights of different colors, trying to figure out which is yours. Then there are the roundabouts. It can be confusing figuring out if the roundabout is a 2-laner that you can merge into, and if you don't you will get honked at; or if just LOOKS like a 2-laner, but when you "merge" in next to the other car on teh roundabout you will get honked at. Either way, you are honked at. And it is easy to get mixed up and think of the left lane as the fast lane on the motorway, as it is in America, but it is actually the RIGHT lane that is fast lane because exits are on the left. So be prepared to get honked at for driving too slow. Honking is a fun pastime here, and I get to hear it a lot. Parking? Well, forget it. The rules are just about impossible to figure out. Cars park on the footpath all the time, but don't do it HERE or you will get a ticket. There really is no place to park, so just make a space on the side of the road, but make sure you don't do it in the wrong place or you will get a ticket. Also make sure you pay the correct meter when you are parking because it is possible that the only one you see around is the wrong one, and you will get a ticket, even though you forked over 4 Euro into the machine.
This whole experience has been so good for Lucy and Sam. I don't know why it is, but they have seemed more mature for doing things on their own some. For instance, one day I dropped them off at the library, and they walked the 1 km walk back home.
A couple of times Thomas and I have gone on short dates to the restaurant/bar in the castle hotel across the street, and they have done famously! They love the independence they feel. (But Sam will ONLY do it with Lucy. We call her the "Great Protector" :) )
Finally, we had a hankering for a little American cookin', so we made some attempts in the month of May:
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| Found some "American style" pancake mix |
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| VERY mediocre enchilada kit. Everything is Old El Paso. Edible, but tasted like spaghetti sauce on tortillas. Notice the Irish cheddar cheese, which offered a twist to the taste. |
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